viernes 28 de diciembre 2018
I read that if I wanted to be an artist I had to keep showing up, so HERE I AM. I don’t want to go anywhere else because it’s raining, I would rather feel at peace right here where I am. But I don’t. Not yet. I could be doing something more productive with my time like putting away my clean clothes, but I already did the dishes and made guacamole for the party tonight. I even garnished it with onions in a way I’m pretty sure no one has ever done before, but I still feel like I’m not enough. I should go for a run soon. I want 100K followers that send 5000 red hearts my way if I post this. Maybe if my posts were funny and light-hearted instead. I’ll watch more comedy next year or read more news to make sassy political cartoons that go viral. I want to get over my ex, but it’s only been 7 days. I read grief doesn’t have a fast-forward button. I want to work on self-improvement, deep down so that he realizes I was worth being around. That feels pathetic. I’ve been staring at the same window for a very long time. Now my eyes hurt, just like the night we broke up when I stared straight at the light bulb for over 6 hours. That was supposed to turn back time.
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